YOU MIGHT BE A RACER[CHICK]
- You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
- You take your helmet along when you go to buy new eyeglasses or check
out cars (seats).
- You feel compelled on a road trip to beat your previous best time.
- You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing =
depth (wear bars showing).
- When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you
- When you hear 'overcooked it', instead of food you think 'off the
- You change engine oil every other week.
- You sometimes hear little noises from your passengers when you get on
the throttle right after
- You thoroughly enjoy showing the tailgater behind how to drive around
a highway off-ramp.
- Your racing budget is one of the big three -- mortgage, car
- Your email address refers to your race car rather than to you.
- You walk proper lines through the grocery store.
- You've been known to yell "It means 'check your mirrors'
- You've paid $4.00 a gallon for gas without complaining.
- You buy new parts because you don't know where you put the spares.
- You bought a race car before buying a house.
- You bought a race car before buying furniture for the new house.
- You're looking for a tow vehicle and still haven't bought furniture!
- You find that you need a new house because you've outgrown your
garage and the neighbors are
threatening violence if you park one
more vehicle on the street or in the front yard.
- The requirements you give your real estate agent are (in order of
importance): 1) 8 car climate
controlled garage with an attached shop.
2) Outside parking for 6 cars, a motorhome, a crew cab dualie, a 28'enclosed trailer and a 34' 5th wheel.
3) 3 phase 220V outlets in the garage for your welder.
4) A grease pit.
5) Convenient to a hazardous waste disposal site.
6) Deaf neighbors.
7) Across the street from a paint and body shop.
8) Some sort of house with a working toilet and shower on the
property somewhere -or- hookups
for the motorhome.
- You measure all family acquisitions in terms of the number of race
tires that could have been
- You know well that Orthodontic work is the equivalent of three sets
- You sit in your race car in a dark garage and make car noises and
shift and practice your heel and
toe, while waiting for your motor to
get back from the machine shop.
- You look at the purchase of tools as a long term investment.
partner says, "If you buy another set of tires, I'm getting
- Your garage holds more cars than your house has bedrooms.
- You have enough spare parts to build another car.
- More than one racer supply house recognizes your voice and greets you
by name when you call.
- You have car parts in your cubicle at work.
- You think the last line of the Star Spangled Banner is: "Racers,
start your engines!"
- If you can't remember when you last worked on weekdays and rested
- You're registered for wedding gifts at
AutoZOne, Canadian Tire and Racer Wholesale.
- Your Christmas list begins with another set of BFG R1's and Pauter
rods (and your 'significant other'
knows what these are).
- After your answer to "What did you do this weekend?" the next
question is always: "And you do this
for fun? Right?"
- You have a separate drawer for 'garage clothes'.
- Your reading material in your bathroom consists of auto parts and
racing supply catalogs, several
books written by famous drivers,
every book Carroll Smith has ever written.... and 400 car
magazines, none of which
have centerfolds and somewhere in the bunch is
- People know you by your class letter, car number, and car color.
- People know you by your
"off"s". "Oh, you are the one stuck in the
mud at ButtonWillow last weekend!"
- You talk to other cars on the road, calling them by the manufacturers
- Your first date involves asking
him to crew for you.
- Your criteria for selecting a significant other include auto
repair skills. Air tools optional.
- Your friends don't recognize you without a helmet and driver's suit.
- Your family remembers your hair color as "grease".
- You plan your wedding around the race schedule.
- You astound the clerk at Sears by bringing in a snapped breaker bar
every other week or so.
- You remember the dates and details of every race you've ever been in,
but can't remember your
- Your family brings the couch into the garage so they can spend some
time with you.
- You complain when cars in front of you on highway off-ramps don't
stay on the line, causing your
exit speed to drop.
- A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic
or organic?" and they reply,
"Vegetable or corn."
- You give out Summit Racing's number when a friend asks for the
best hardware store.
- You refer to the corner down the street from your house as "Turn One."
- You look at the fire hydrant at that corner and see an apex marker.
- You enjoy driving in the rain on the way to work or school.
- You always late apex the intersection and try to pass a few cars
- Everywhere you go, you try to find the fastest line through the turn.
- You always do a toe & heel downshift while whoever might be your
passenger gives you a real
- You can't stand anyone telling others how to drive. Of course, you
are the best.
- You can't stand
- You always want to change something in your street car to make it
- You will gladly pay up to $8 for a quart of engine oil.
- You hate long distance driving, but you will gladly drive 800 miles
to the race track.
- You think that traction control and ABS are for those who can't drive.
- You've ever tried to convince your
husband you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on
- You save broken car parts as "mementos".
- Your last several freeway forays included just brushing the curbs as
you apexed the on-ramps
- You've found your lawn mower runs pretty good on 108 octane gas
(but doesn't particularly care
- The local tire shop won't honor the tread life warranty on any car
you have been within 50 yards of...
- The shop manager at your local car dealer mutters "dear Lord" under
his breath after he sees the
size of your exhaust piping.
- The local police and state Highway Patrol have a picture of your car
taped to their dashboard.
- You spend more time polishing your exhaust tip every day than you
do on your hair.
- Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have
- You would choose a roll bar over air conditioning if it were an
- You enjoy driving through wet, empty parking lots and using the
emergency brake to kick the back
- White smoke coming out from under your tires is a common sight.
- You consider the redline a "conservative suggestion" and the rev
limiter "a fun limiter"
- You spend more on insurance premiums than on
food or make up.
- Your idea of a good time is sitting around figuring out gear ratios
and the ideal final drive ratio for
- When someone refers to "The Good Book", you think of "The Auto
- When someone asks where you went to school, you reply, "Skip Barber".
- You have racing shops programmed on your speed dialer.
- You own five cars and only one of them is street legal.
- You know the 1/4 mile times and skid pad numbers of your riding
mower and want to improve them.
- You've embarrassed your significant other at least once by insisting
on wearing your full face helmet
- You know the "racing line" of every turn in your daily commute,
including your alternate routes,
and practice hitting them every day.
- You quote your street tire wear life in weeks rather than miles.
- You regularly live test your rev limiter on that straight that's a
little too long for 2nd but not worth
going into 3rd for.
- You've started looking for sponsors for your daily commute.
- You've slalomed in a construction zone, and counted your penalty time
in the rearview afterwards.
- After you tell your
husband where you'd like to go on your vacation
he answers: "Why... is there a
If you have answered "Yes" to
any of the above - you are a true racerchick
-- Welcome to your website!!!